It was all easier when I was twelve years old. My dreams seemed close, my ambitions were very clear and I had a very dominant tone of confidence and style. I wrote with my heart, I seemed happy about myself and I felt safe. But now, at nineteen I feel lost, clueless and confused. My days begin and end with a feeling of insecurity these days. I feel like I have lost my dreams. I really have let myself down. My school changed, My College was a huge disappointment, and I was forced to mix with a group of people who did not belong to the world I grew up in. Gone were the times when people celebrated me. Now I was the odd one out in the group. I couldn’t discuss lifestyle with my teachers; I couldn’t laugh with my friends. This was the first time I felt unsure.
All along my life I had always had the right to choose between right and wrong, and easy and tough. Or so I thought. I thought I was making the choices all by myself, but now on analysing things, I can see that I was indirectly analysing on the social suitability of my choices. I never did anything because I simply wanted to do it.
The day I turned I turned thirteen was like a fairy tale. I was so cheerful and I could literally feel the confidence that seemed to overflow. I was sure that I would make my dreams come true. But all good things come to an end.
Now at nineteen, I am guilty for changing. I wish I could bring back that head strong girl who, I was told would make life really tough. I think I chased her away, but I know that she still hides somewhere deep in the dark corners of my heart.
It does not to dwell in dreams and forget to live.
Yes. Albus was right.